"Making It Make Sense" (SM) with Dr. Pamela Brewer
WHEN THE IMPOSSIBLE HAPPENS
COPING
WITH
DISASTER...
by Pamela B. Brewer, MSW, PhD., LCSW-C
1. Allow yourself the humanity of grief, anger, worry...all the emotions that make you human. trying not to have the feelings is expending your energy in ways that will ultimately hurt you and deny your humanity.
2. Allow those around you the same respect you are hopefully allowing yourself.
3. Assure the children around you that you love them and will always do what you can to keep them safe. do not promise what you can not. do help your child to feel empowered by engaging them in conversations about ways to feel/be more safe.
4. Limit the amount of time you spend watching/listening to the news outlets. listen enough to get the information your need ... but at some point... you need to give your heart, your soul and your ears a break from the media coverage. the same is true for the children and seniors around you.
5. Review your disaster/safety plan with the adults and children in your home. your safety plan should include alternate phone numbers to reach each other and family/friends in another state, emergency supplies, alternate places to meet. when you are ready, think about the things/information you would need in an emergency. during the initial days of shock - do not try to formulate a plan unless this will help to soothe you. if it is not soothing - give yourself within the next 30 days to work on your plan. but do... work on your plan.
6. Resolve to live each day being thoughtful and mindful of yourself and others. do not take for granted any day... any moment.
7. Find ways to help...whether the help is to persons known or unknown to you personally - finding ways to help others...helps you. help can be large or small...and sometimes the "smallest" help...is the most meaningful...a phone call, a hug, an acknowledgement...help comes in many forms.
8. As no other, this is often the time to force yourself, if you must, to reach out to others - your medical and mental health professionals - family, friends, neighbors, strangers, support groups...reach out in ways that feel safe and supportive.