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DOMESTIC
VIOLENCE
IT AFFECTS US ALL....
By Pamela Brewer
Domestic violence affects all of us
either directly or indirectly. Domestic violence is a leading cause of
depression, anxiety and a host of medical ailments. Domestic violence is a leading cause of relationship dysfunction throughout the generations.
Each of us has an obligation to stop it. Each of us has an obligation to report it. Each of us have an opportunity to say no to the violence... we don't have to laugh at "jokes" that include violence...they are not funny. We can say so. We don't have to turn our heads in silence when we witness abusive behavior. We can report the abuse.
And even though reporting can be a scary thing - both for the victim and the bystander... it is an important tool in the fight against violence. For the person is experiencing the violence - the decision to report is a complicated one that is best discussed with a trusted confidant and well planned... if at all possible.
WE NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT:
Children who experience domestic violence are
more likely to become abusers or be victimized by abusers throughout their
lifetime.
With professional help, both abusers and victims can heal and lead productive lives. With professional help, the victim is able to heal from the trauma of the abuse and lead a healthy life. With extended professional help, the abuser can learn the origins of the abusive behavior, ways to manage the agression, the low self-esteem, etc. and become a non-violent productive individual.
Abused persons are likely to suffer from anxiety, depression, low self-esteem and more. It is these feelings/beliefs ... that often keeps abusers feeling locked inside the abuse.
Abusers lie. They try to convince the person they are hurting that they deserve the hurt. This is a lie. Abusers try to convince the person being hurt that the problem is with them. It is not. The problem with abuse...is the abuser.
You cannot identify an abuser by his/her look,
age, education or employment.
You cannot identify a victim by his or her
look.
You cannot identify a victim or an abuser by
his or her economic or professional station in life.
ABUSE TAKES ON MANY FORMS INCLUDING EMOTIONAL, PHYSICAL AND SEXUAL.
HERE ARE SOME SIGNS THAT YOU MAY BE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATONSHIP:
Your partner needs to know where you are at all
times. If for some reason you deviate from what your partner has “approved,” you
know there will be consequences. Serious consequences.
You are the person blamed when something goes
wrong in your partner's day.
Your partner is routinely disrespectful and/or
dismissive of you in front of others and behind closed doors.
You suffer negative consequences any time you
disagree with something your partner says or does, or refuse to behave in a way your partner insists you do - this includes sexual activities.
THERE IS MUCH TO LEARN AND UNDERSTAND ... CUT AND PASTE THE FOLLOWING LINKS...
HELP GUIDE - http://helpguide.org/mental/domestic_violence_abuse_types_signs_causes_effects.htm
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HOTLINE - http://www.thehotline.org
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE INFORMATION - www.domesticviolence.org
NATIONAL COALITION AGAINST DOMESTIC VIOLENCE - http://www.ncadv.org/
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE - MEDLINE - www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/domesticviolence.html
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